Cigarettes & Sporks: An Earth Day Report

Yesterday, as I was driving to the mall wearing my eco-friendly brown polymer suit, windows down, Foo Fighters coming from the speakers, the woman in the car in front of me flicked her cigarette out the window. The forces of wind sent the lipstick-laced butt into my car window, where it landed smack-dab on my arm. I now have the circular initiation burn mark I've always dreamed of. When the swelling goes down, the mark will blend nicely with my forearm's constellation of freckles. (Little Dipper or Big Dipper, depending on your angle.)

OK, this didn't really happen. But the woman in the car ahead of me was smoking, windows down, and as the smoke wafted into my open window, I thought, What if? It would be a little bit hilarious, on Earth Day, to sustain minor injury from someone's ignited litter. Maybe "hilarious" is the wrong word. Painful, ironic, humiliating, furor-inducing?

No, I stand by hilarious.

Every mall worth its salt and fat contains a food court, and part of my Earth Day celebration took place there. (The polymer suit, alas, is also a work of fiction.) No, I did not need a plastic fork to eat my pizza slice. No, I did not need extra napkins. I did need, later, a cherry slushie float from Dairy Queen -- half price, as this DQ holds a regular afternoon Happy Hour.

My Earth Day maybe was not the most nutritious.

Moving on. It is certainly good to consider all the extra napkins, sporks, straws, etc. we use in a given day. The cans and bottles we toss when there's no recycling bin around. I'm a longtime recycler, but I'm nowhere near the level of Renee Sweany, the founder of Green Piece Indy, who I wrote about for this week's NUVO as part of their Green Guide.

Talking to her inspired me: besides a basement full of recyclable/reusable items that I'm eager to purge, I've been seriously thinking of getting some worms to make compost for the garden this year. They do a nice little turnaround with your kitchen scraps. I'm somewhat concerned about where to keep a big ole container of worms. But it looks like some space will be opening up in the basement soon.

Whole Lotta Links

Hello, beautiful nobody and everybody. Spring is all up in your business, no? Yes.

Please take a moment from your frolicking to read my interview with writer Steve Almond, here at Knee-Jerk Magazine. Congrats to Knee-Jerk for getting honorable mention (along with Cerise Press and Slush Pile) as best new online journal/magazine from storySouth's Million Writers Award competition. Top honors went to kill author, which published my short fiction, Sex in Secret, in Issue Two. They're already working on Issue Six, those busy anonymous editors.

And now back to spring: trail-walking (and there's Christopher on his bike. Hi, Christopher!), eating Indiana honey crisp apples at Locally Grown Gardens (Chef Ron rules: he quotes Ice Cube, plays reggae nonstop, and refers to "the culture-transgressive gift of fruits and vegetables"), picking up the pot of tulips knocked over by squirrel or wind for the second time today. Squirrel, I know it's you. But I shake your tiny, grimy paw today, pally-o. Frolic away.